# Edit Suggestions for 77【出家与解脱】

Translator: opencode-go/deepseek-v4-pro
Reviewer: self
Date: 2026-08-06

## Summary

Translation is accurate and readable. One minor terminology consistency fix applied. No structural or major content issues found. The three-pass review identified no missing content, mistranslation, or serious fluency problems.

## Applied Fixes

1. **Terminology consistency: 红尘** (line 163). "red dust of the world" → "that worldly dust" to match the earlier rendering of 红尘 as "worldly dust" in the same sentence. The metaphor is preserved; the rendering is now consistent.

## Terminology Notes

Key term decisions checked against the terms DB:

- 出家 → "renunciation" / "leaving home" — varies by context, consistent throughout
- 解脱 → "liberation" — consistent
- 出离心 → "renunciation" — matches 佛教术语 source
- 菩提心 → "bodhicitta" — standard convention
- 空性 → "emptiness"
- 五蕴 → "five aggregates"
- 轮回 → "samsara"
- 正见 → "right view"
- 戒定慧 → "precepts, concentration, and wisdom"
- 声闻乘 → "Śrāvakayāna"
- 菩萨乘 → "Bodhisattva vehicle"
- 凡夫心 → "ordinary mind" — consistent throughout

## Considerations

- The translation uses a formal-but-warm register appropriate for a Dharma talk by Master Jiqun to a monastic audience. Rhetorical questions and first-person asides are preserved.
- Sanskrit terms (śramaṇa, saṅgha, bodhicitta, dhutaṅga, etc.) are used where appropriate with English glosses on first occurrence.
- The three sufferings (苦苦、坏苦、行苦) include parenthetical Sanskrit for precision, suitable for this audience.
- The "shaven-headed layperson" rendering of 光头俗汉 is deliberately colloquial to match the source's pointedness.