283 lines
8.1 KiB
Plaintext
283 lines
8.1 KiB
Plaintext
# Translation Findings — 佛教徒的人生态度
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{% Full review of bilingual.dj (323 paragraphs, DOCX English as target). %}
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## A. Missing Content (Critical)
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Translation truncated mid-paragraph. CN paragraphs fully drafted in earlier sections, suggesting these were cut short.
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### A1. Line 66–67 — Missing 兴趣/先天后天/责任感
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CN covers: perception → looking back → 兴趣是最好的老师 → 先天因素(过去生积累)+ 后天培养 → 责任感使命感
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EN stops after first two sentences.
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### A2. Line 123–124 — Missing Jianzhen quote and conclusion
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EN stops at "became the founding patriarch of the Vinaya School in Japan."
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Missing: rhetorical question, Jianzhen's quote "传法事大,浩淼大海何足为惧", and paragraph conclusion.
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### A3. Line 231–232 — Missing nirvana discussion
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EN stops at "any worldly happiness is only a brief relief from suffering, fleeting and impermanent."
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Missing: entire nirvana discussion, root of suffering, illness metaphor.
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### A4. Line 237–238 — Missing Liang Qichao quote
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EN stops at "a lifelong commitment that extends endlessly into the future."
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Missing: rhetorical climax and Liang Qichao on the bodhisattva spirit.
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### A5. Line 303–304 — Missing three Chan poems
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EN ends with colon suggesting poems follow. Three Chan poems absent. Also missing paragraph conclusion about young people fearing Buddhism.
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### A6. Line 462–463 — Missing Buddha's motivation
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EN ends at "can we do so without regret?"
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Missing: Buddha witnessing suffering, seeking truth, and the question about what Buddhism means by contemplating death.
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### A7. Line 468–469 — Missing Confucius/Western philosophers
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EN: single short sentence. Missing: Confucius quote, Western philosophers, and the link between understanding death and life perspective.
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### A8. Line 519–520 — Missing rarity of human birth
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EN stops at "Shakyamuni Buddha attained enlightenment here in the human world—not in a heavenly one."
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Missing: the fingernail-dirt analogy and discussion of why human realm is ideal for practice.
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### A9. Line 558–559 — Missing Medicine Buddha Sutra content
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EN: single sentence. Missing: entire Medicine Buddha Sutra discussion about meeting material needs, healing illness, and end-of-life care.
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### A10. Line 597–598 — Missing end-of-life care continuation
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EN ends mid-paragraph. Missing: "所以多数人并没有十分的把握..." and the rest of the end-of-life care discussion.
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### A11. Line 657–658 — Missing pure wealth discussion
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EN ends after first sentence. Missing: discussion of career choice, precepts, and the relationship between right livelihood and practice.
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### A12. Line 660–661 — Missing Diamond Sutra merit comparison
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EN missing: the detailed seven-comparison passage from the Diamond Sutra about merit.
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---
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## B. Grammar
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### B1. Line 55 — Subject-verb agreement
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```
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- being proactive seem positive
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+ being proactive seems positive
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```
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### B2. Line 205 — Parallel structure
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```
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- find the value of life or understanding the purpose of living
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+ find the value of life or understand the purpose of living
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```
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### B3. Line 292 — Subject-verb agreement
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```
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- pessimism easily lead to despair
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+ pessimism easily leads to despair
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```
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### B4. Line 394 — Missing space after comma
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```
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- Dependent Origination,Sentient beings
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+ Dependent Origination, sentient beings
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```
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### B5. Line 493 — Missing auxiliary verb
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```
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- the Buddha inspired to pursue
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+ the Buddha was inspired to pursue
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```
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### B6. Line 502 — Wrong phrasing
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```
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- lose their part to guide the public
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+ lose their role in guiding the public
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```
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### B7. Line 517 — Wrong participle
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```
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- heavenly beings are only indulged in pleasures
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+ heavenly beings are only indulging in pleasures
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```
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### B8. Line 526 — Word order
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```
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- but do deeply we understand
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+ but do we deeply understand
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```
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### B9. Line 613 — Missing word
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```
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- and say that neglect their parents
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+ and say that they neglect their parents
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```
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### B10. Line 643 — Redundant "both"
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```
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- both in both China and abroad
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+ both in China and abroad
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```
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### B11. Line 676 — Subject-verb agreement
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```
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- community ... actively engage
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+ community ... actively engages
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```
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### B12. Line 877 — Missing conjunction
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```
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- like glue, binds people together
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+ like glue that binds people together
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```
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### B13. Line 901 — Missing "but"
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```
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- not only ... and should also
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+ not only ... but also
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```
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### B14. Line 985 — Redundant wording
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```
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- identified its root causes of it
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+ identified its root causes
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```
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---
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## C. Word Choice
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### C1. Line 31 — "Cherish life or face death"
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CN: 重生还是重死 = "focus on/value life or focus on/value death". "Face death" implies confronting death, not weighing it heavily. Consider: "Focus on life or on death."
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### C2. Line 742 — Spelling
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```
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- Chan adobe
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+ Chan abode
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```
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### C3. Line 820 — "cynicism" for 厌世
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CN: 厌世 = world-weariness / pessimism toward life. "Cynicism" (犬儒主义) has different connotations in English.
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### C4. "ordination" vs "renunciation" for 出家
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Mixed usage throughout. Lines 226, 229, 235, 814, 817 use "ordination" (correct). Other sections use "renunciation." Standardize to "ordination."
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### C5. Line 988 — Terminology inconsistency
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"Twelvefold Dependent Arising" here vs "Twelve Links of Dependent Origination" elsewhere (line 886 etc.). Standardize.
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---
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## D. Chapter Numbering
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### D1. Line 844 — Wrong Roman numeral
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```
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- VI. To Love or Not to Love?
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+ VII. To Love or Not to Love?
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```
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### D2. Line 994 — Chapter mismatch
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CN: 九、结束语. EN: VIII. Conclusion. Should be IX.
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---
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## E. PDF Typeset vs DOCX Manuscript — Substantive Differences
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The typeset PDF (二排) contains editorial changes not in the DOCX manuscript.
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These are documented for reference; which version is authoritative must be decided.
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### E1. "ordination" → "renunciation" (×3)
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DOCX: "ordination" / "Ordination" / "True ordination"
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PDF: "renunciation" / "Renunciation" / "True renunciation"
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CN: 出家. Standard translation is "ordination."
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### E2. "arising, abiding, emptying" → "forming, existing, vanishing"
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DOCX: "arising, abiding, decaying, and emptying"
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PDF: "forming, existing, decaying, and vanishing"
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CN: 成住坏空. Both are non-standard; standard is "formation, existence, decay, emptiness."
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### E3. "Arising," → "Origination,"
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Context: "Arising, abiding, changing, and ceasing" → "Origination, abiding, changing, and ceasing"
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### E4. "Attitude" → "Attitudes" (×3 in title)
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DOCX: "The Life Attitude of Buddhists" in some places
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PDF: "The Life Attitudes of Buddhists" throughout
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### E5. "renouncing the world" → "pessimistic toward life"
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DOCX: "view Buddhism as renouncing the world"
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PDF: "view it as pessimistic toward life"
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CN: 厌世
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### E6. "cynicism" → "pessimism toward life"
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DOCX: "while cynicism is passive and negative"
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PDF: "while pessimism toward life is passive and negative"
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CN: 厌世
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### E7. "being aimless" → "who feel"
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DOCX: "young people being aimless, hopeless"
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PDF: "young people who feel aimless and hopeless"
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CN: 没有目标
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### E8. "suffice. Its" → "be enough. That relief loses its"
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DOCX: "no amount of temporary relief will suffice. Its effectiveness diminishes"
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PDF: "no amount of temporary relief will be enough. That relief loses its effectiveness"
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Full sentence rewritten.
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### E9. "it—our" → "suffering—our"
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DOCX: "the root causes of it—our inner delusion"
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PDF: "the root causes of suffering—our inner delusion"
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### E10. "Buddhism" → "it"
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DOCX: "view Buddhism as renouncing the world"
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PDF: "view it as pessimistic toward life"
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### E11. "transcendence" → "renunciation"
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DOCX: "a proactive transcendence upon seeing the true nature"
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PDF: "a proactive renunciation upon seeing the true nature"
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CN: 主动超越
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### E12. Chapter numbering shifts
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DOCX uses "1.", "2.", etc. PDF uses "I", "II", etc. The DOCX uses "VIII" for chapter 8 while PDF shifts numbering (chapter 9 = "VIII" in PDF).
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### E13. Quote borders shifted
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PDF adds quotation marks around several words that DOCX leaves unquoted (e.g. "now", "this", "moment", "pure", "wealth").
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PDF adds a comma: "sutra" → "sutra," and "moment" → "moment,".
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