62 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
62 lines
13 KiB
Plaintext
## X. Growth of Mind and Conduct
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### What to Do When Afflictions Arise
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Q: Lately I have encountered many problems in life. I feel helpless and keep giving ground to affliction step by step. This feeling of being unable to help myself is truly painful. I long for peace. Is this wholesome desire? How should I resolve afflictions?
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A: The word *affliction* means disturbance: "fan" is to agitate, and "nao" is to disorder. It is a negative mental state that disturbs the mind, leaving us unfree and unrested, living in exhaustion and pain. The wish to be free from affliction is one many people have experienced, especially when caught in affliction; then the feeling becomes especially strong, and one may be willing to pay any price. Whether this is wholesome desire depends on how you try to solve it. When ordinary people have afflictions, they may drown their sorrows in drink, lose themselves in games, or seek relief through eating, drinking, shopping, and entertainment. These methods may offer some temporary relief, but they are only escape; they cannot solve the problem at its root, and they bring many side effects.
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To resolve afflictions, the key is to see clearly how they arise. In fact, many afflictions come from our views. How things in the world affect us depends not on the things themselves, but on how we regard them. Therefore we need to understand which views do not create afflictions, so that we can counteract them. The Dharma divides thinking into two kinds: unreasonable attention, which is erroneous thinking; and reasonable attention, which is wise thinking. If we look at problems with erroneous thinking, we create afflictions everywhere and always. Conversely, whatever circumstances we meet, we can accept them peacefully and seek a wise solution. Thus the way of thinking is very important; it can stop afflictions before they have a chance to manifest. But to completely cut off afflictions and their root causes, we must rely on right view and realize emptiness through meditation.
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### Accepting Adversity Is the Way to Stop the Loss
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Q: I am a psychological worker. During the Wenchuan earthquake I did psychological aid work, helping many families who had lost their children process their emotions and get through their grief. But I could not answer this question: "Why did this happen to me?" From the perspective of cause and effect, were they simply getting what they deserved?
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A: The Dharma views all the joys and sorrows, reunions and partings of the world through cause and effect and impermanence. But when the other person does not have such understanding and is in extreme grief, this way of speaking can sound heartless. Therefore we must express it skillfully, so as not to upset them or make them emotionally unable to accept it. Looking at the result in this present life, such a death is a great misfortune for oneself and one's family. But from the perspective of samsara, death is not an end; it is also the beginning of a new life. If their wholesome karma ripens, their destination may not be worse than the present.
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Moreover, every day in the world there are natural and man-made disasters; as the saying goes, life does not go as we wish nine times out of ten. If we do not accept adversity, it is as the sutras say: after being struck by one poisoned arrow, we are struck by a second, causing greater harm. In such circumstances, acceptance is the effective way to stop the loss in time. If through this we can come to know impermanence and turn adversity into an opportunity for practice, we can not only emerge from grief ourselves but also benefit the departed loved ones.
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### Two Basic Principles for Handling Emotions
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Q: The Dharma regards emotions as the false self and says we should keep our distance from them. But ordinary people get caught up in emotions and cannot keep their distance. Psychology holds that repression, isolation, and other emotional defense mechanisms can cause emotional numbness, stagnation, and other problems. For ordinary people, is there a universal way to handle negative emotions? In a lecture the teacher said we should open the pure intuition of life. Is this related to the subconscious?
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A: In dealing with negative emotions, there are two basic points. First, do not create emotions. Negative emotions do not fall from the sky; traced to their root, they come mainly from our views and ways of thinking. In fact, things not going as we wish is the normal state of life. It is only when we cannot see this correctly that we give rise to anger, anxiety, insecurity, and other negative emotions. In fact, these emotions do not help solve problems at all; they only make people lose their reason and make things worse. Therefore we must change our views, so that when facing problems we do not give rise to emotions. Just as in disease prevention, prevention is the key.
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Second, do not accumulate emotions. Emotions can grow. Whether anger, jealousy, or anxiety, once they arise, if we do not think reasonably but continue with unreasonable attention, we provide nourishment for the negative emotions and make them grow. Just as when you dislike someone, you manufacture many reasons to dislike them, and the more you think about it the more you dislike them. Therefore, when negative emotions arise, do not indulge them or give them room to grow. Instead, learn to examine them: Why do these emotions arise? What exactly is emotion? Is its existence reasonable? When we can calmly observe it, the emotion becomes like an inactivated virus and no longer has destructive power.
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Most important is to open insight wisdom through meditation, for only then can emotions be completely eliminated. Of course this is difficult. For ordinary people, the first two points are all doable. As for pure intuition, it cannot simply be equated with the subconscious. The subconscious has different levels; for example, the seventh Manas consciousness and the eighth Alaya consciousness belong to the subconscious, but both are within the system of the deluded mind. Only by transcending the deluded mind can one enter pure intuition.
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### Neither Arrogant Nor Inferior
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Q: I used to feel quite good about myself, but later, influenced by others, I began to feel somewhat inferior and especially care about what others think. How should I adjust my mindset?
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A: People often cannot see themselves clearly and unconsciously compare themselves with others. Some like to compare their strengths with others' weaknesses, which makes them feel good about themselves, even blindly arrogant. Others always exaggerate their own shortcomings and use them to negate themselves. Neither is a true perception, and both reflect non-acceptance of oneself. Everyone has strengths and shortcomings; this is normal, because each person's accumulated life is different. Only by understanding one's present state and accepting it as it is can one progress on that basis. Otherwise, the arrogant will become stuck in their ways, and the inferior will sell themselves short; neither is conducive to the optimization of life.
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Caring about others' opinions likewise comes from not seeing oneself clearly. When one is not clear about life's goals, does not know what one can do, and does not know what one truly wants and does not want, one is easily influenced by the outside world. If through learning Buddhism one establishes right view and makes autonomous choices for one's life, one will not care so much. We can use others' opinions to examine ourselves: if there is something to correct, correct it; if not, take it as encouragement. Beyond that, there is no need to think too much, or it will only add unnecessary affliction. The root of learning Buddhism lies in removing self-grasping. If we stubbornly hold on to this "self," even caring about others' opinions, our suffering will never end.
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### Making the Use of Time More Valuable
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Q: Since joining the practice program a year ago, I have changed tremendously and also influenced my family to take refuge. Now I feel I should devote more energy to practice, but in life I am a daughter, a mother, a wife, and an employee. I find it hard to balance my time. For example, in caring for the baby, if I want to practice, I have to leave the child with the elderly, but from the perspective of filial respect I should not add to their burden. What should I do?
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A: Lay practitioners all have responsibilities in family, work, and society, and sometimes feel that learning Buddhism conflicts with these worldly duties. This is mainly because one is still a beginner and has not yet learned to apply the Dharma well. As we become more wise and compassionate through practice, we can handle matters more skillfully. Many things in life have no standard answer; we must judge according to the conditions of the moment. For example, having elderly parents look after the child is not necessarily unfilial; it can also be a way for them to enjoy family happiness. Which it is depends on the specific situation and on your words, actions, attitude, and manner in handling it.
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Moreover, when our minds have not settled into the Dharma, random thoughts fly about. Many people busily pass their days, spending much time on wandering thoughts, playing with phones, chatting, shopping, or creating all kinds of unnecessary social engagements. After learning Buddhism, life becomes simpler and we can save a great deal of time for study and for doing things that benefit sentient beings. Not only that, when your wisdom grows, even caring for children and doing housework can be part of practice and is not in conflict with learning Buddhism. When relating to others, use it to train understanding, companionship, and care; when simply doing tasks, use it to train awareness and abiding in the present moment. When time is used more valuably, your life becomes more valuable.
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### Ghosts Are Sentient Beings Too; Don't Be Afraid
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Q: After learning Buddhism I believe in the six realms of rebirth, but whenever I think of beings in the ghost realm, I feel especially afraid and resistant. How can I counter this?
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A: Fear of ghosts is partly because they are unseen, and together with frightening descriptions in legends and artistic works, the imagination has great room to run, giving rise to fear. It is also because one's own right mindfulness is not strong enough and one is easily disturbed. Regarding this, one can recite the Buddha's name or the Three Refuges, and visualize the merit of the Three Jewels protecting us. These holy names have great power and blessings; they can settle body and mind and dispel fear.
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Furthermore, we should reflect that ghosts also belong to the six realms and are among the beings that Buddhists vow to help. Their becoming ghosts is the bitter fruit of unwholesome karma; they are already most unfortunate. What is there to fear? If we are filled with compassion, whatever beings we encounter, our minds will hold only compassion, with no fear and no hatred. It is only when we lack compassion that we are seized by fear or negative emotions. Therefore, what thoughts occupy the mind is very important. If we can constantly arouse bodhicitta and cultivate compassion, we will be filled with strength.
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### Letting Wisdom Shine into Dreams
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Q: How does Buddhism regard human dreams?
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Master Jiqun: Generally speaking, dreams are the manifestation of deluded, confused thinking; therefore Buddhism has the expression "inverted dreams." From the Buddhist point of view, our whole life is a dream, not only the dreams we have while asleep. As for ordinary dreams, they are related to mental activity. In addition, they may be influenced by many factors: sometimes certain spirits enter into the dream state; sometimes one may perceive the manifestation of Buddhas and bodhisattvas in a dream; sometimes when practice reaches a certain level, corresponding states appear in dreams; sometimes consciousness has a premonition and knows in a dream things that are about to happen; sometimes exceptionally powerful seeds left over from past lives continuously appear in dreams throughout this life and many lives to come, and so on—it is impossible to list them all.
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Q: The *Diamond Sutra* says, "All conditioned phenomena are like a dream, an illusion, a bubble, a shadow." Physicists also say the universe is a holographic projection. But all this is too real; the suffering and joy we experience draw us in and we cannot free ourselves. How can we distinguish dreams from reality?
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A: When we are dreaming, everything is also very real; only upon waking do we realize it was a dream. We are now in the great dream of ignorance; before awakening, we likewise feel this dream is very real and throw ourselves into it wholeheartedly, feeling joy, sorrow, and fear because of it. Only after awakening can we see clearly that all we experienced was nothing but dream-images, inverted delusion. But it is hard to distinguish them by conscious thinking alone; we must open insight wisdom through practice in order to see the true suchness of all phenomena. The Buddha, after his awakening, told us what he saw in order to awaken sentient beings still asleep. Having heard these teachings, we must still realize them through practice; otherwise we remain in the dream and cannot understand what the Buddha was saying.
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